I read somewhere that to identify your passion you should take note of the things that make you angry or sad when they’re not done well. My list is not so long.

I think the first time I shed tears while reading a book was when someone was describing hungry children picking through a garbage bin. Man is so frail. You actually have to eat everyday. All your pride and intelligence are reduced to nothing if you simply cannot find food to eat. But for kids, brought into this world against their will, supposed to be going through a playful happy induction into this wicked world, seeing them have to worry about where the next meal is coming from just touches a fibre of my being. I wish every hungry child in the world could be fed.

I think the hunger thing touches me even for adults too, because I have a tendency for ulcer. I’ve had incidents where for some reason I couldn’t eat and when the gripe pangs came it wasn’t funny. Basically I couldn’t sit up. Even after eating I would still be in pain and would have to lie down for a while to recover. So yeah, I don’t want anyone getting to that stage. I hear some people in refugee camps are so hungry that even if food were put in front of them they would be unable to eat. They have to be fed by drip. Sighs.

Closely tied to this hunger thing is my hatred for greed. I can hardly refrain from judging people who steal resources meant for everyone. You have enough to last a lifetime and more but because of your greed you can’t stop to think of those dying of hunger. Making money is fine. Just don’t steal and make the children starve as a result.

I think I watch Top Gear too much. I’m a gadget freak and to me, the car is the ultimate gadget. After watching my mates testing supercars on TV, returning to the reality of my pothole roads is not depressing. It is gut wrenching. I won’t even talk more about this.

I hate slow internet. I think my time abroad spoilt me. I’m used to queuing YouTube videos in a random playlist to play in the background while I study. I’m used to downloading entire seasons of  tv shows in minutes. I’m used to bufferless Skype. I’m used to seeing the tweet I sent appear on my TL before the phone message “Posting Tweet” disappears from the top of the screen. Need I go on? I’m very impatient with anything less than this.

Nepa comes close. That feeling of helplessness when the power goes out is something I’ve never gotten used to. I could be watching a countdown video (Top ten deadliest predators in India, 50 sexiest bodies, or the Naija Hot 20 tracks) when suddenly, just when the number one winner is about to be revealed (topping the king cobra, Beyonce and Wizkid), Nepa strikes. I’m so pained about this I feel like laughing. The generator is not the problem. It’s the interruption that hurts. Happily I’ve largely resolved this by getting an inverter. The AC, pressing iron and microwave still go off but at least the TV stays on and my sleep is never interrupted by Nepa. Thank God for small mercies.

The last thing on my list is people refusing to tell me where I stepped wrong, choosing to carry on in malice instead. I’m not going to say more than stating that the only times I’ve lost my temper have been due to this. Ok once I struggled with a bus conductor over ten naira change but he was refusing to respect my height so there were other issues involved.

So there! I don’t think this list is exhaustive but I’m sure you can add one or two things that rile you up.

See you tomorrow people.

Why would you trade enduring intimacies for cheap thrills with a whore?
for dalliance with a promiscuous stranger?
(Prov. 5 vs 20, The Message)