Just like that I found myself in a sea of nothingness. I was not standing, sitting, or lying down, neither did I remember how I got there or how long I had been there. I had just woken up into this state with the sudden, violent start of a sleeping baby about to suffocate.
He was here. I will not attempt to describe the surging confusion of emotion that convulsed the depths of my soul. I was unable to understand how I could feel such fear and security at the same time. My fear of pain, rejection, insanity, death and disease culminated in this huge panic that made me impulsively want to flee from this aura and hide in some deep underground cave. Yet, at the same time, while He was here, I knew no one else could interfere with our interaction or dare come close. I felt like I was the focus of ten thousand times ten thousand attentive eyes.
He spoke. Or rather He thought. And I heard His thoughts in my heart. I was relieved He was not here yet for my judgement. Instead, as if postponing such terrible inevitable affairs till a future date yet to be determined, He was curious to know what I wanted in life. Instantly, my father’s words to me as a child flashed through my mind: Wisdom is the principal thing; in all your getting, get understanding.
Once again I knew that spark of the flow of consciousness that went from my heart to His. He was overjoyed. This I could not really understand because I also felt like my thoughts were carried in that direction like a lily on the stream by His overwhelming presence. It was impossible to be distracted from Him. I could think nothing without feeling His thoughts pushing me towards a pre-determined conclusion. And yet He was happy. I did not see a smile. All I felt was the joy of seeing a rainbow in the sunny clear skies just after the rain. And irresistibly, I was happy too.
Immediately, the nothingness around me fell away and I was fully aware of the clothes of my Visitor. It seemed like I was looking down at the stars I had loved to look up at in the night skies when I wanted to clear my head. I felt Him move and the stars moved altogether in a pattern that was so practised I knew it would last forever, unchanging through thousands and thousands of generations. I could understand the dance of the stars!! But not the dance of Him who wore them.
At the same time, I began to recall every face, touch, conversation and detail I had ever seen, heard or experienced. I was overwhelmed by the universe a second time, only this universe was my mind. At first, it all seemed so new I thought I was learning so many new things under the sun all at once!!! It took me a while to realize that these were just memories that, despite having been suppressed for me to keep my sanity, had remained crystal clear in the undercurrents of my mind. I knew the meals people had eaten on their way to Jerusalem. I read people’s thoughts in retrospect merely by recognizing (remembering) patterns in their body language and subsequent behaviour. I remembered all my friends and somehow knew what they had made of their lives by a simple projection of their childhood personalities. I knew this was not prophecy, just plain observation. I could tell the unique combinations of the basic building blocks that defined human character and, like a mason, I could predict in what direction those bricks would fall when subjected to various circumstances. I understood human motivation and the human struggle for domination, acceptance, love and respect. I deeply knew everyone I had ever met and even those I had not met by an uncanny analysis of the signature effects of the dominant person influences on all the people I had met. By meeting, I mean the slightest glance in my direction from anyone whom I had so much as made eye contact with in my entire life.
This power to manipulate people came with an unstated purpose. I was to make my nation great. I knew my Visitor had promised my father a kingdom that would last forever. My job was to stamp the consciousness of my people so deep in the collective mind of the world that thousands of years afterwards, people would still regard my people with respect and fear. As the third King, I was being given the permission to over-awe the world to such an extent as to be the benchmark of greatness the world over, for many years to come after my death. I could not resist. The commission was as pleasant to me as the thoughts of my Commissioner were irresistible. I gladly accepted it.
Although I knew everything in my mind, the desire to explore the world to confirm my knowledge was equally overwhelming. I just had to experience everything I knew was out there. My mind wanted to fly, to seduce beautiful women, to conquer the most stubborn cultures, to bring the world to my doorstep with gifts of silver and gold I would not pay for except with my benevolent smile. I already knew my life would be futile in essence since it would not last forever, but still I wanted to prove the strength of this rumoured futility. If anyone could find out the meaning of life, it would be me. And if I did not find it, no son of man after me would be able to.
All of a sudden I was conscious of being in my Royal Throneroom Hall of judgement. I was visibly alarmed because even though I felt as though I had just woken up from a dream, this Reality I had woken up to seemed more like the dream compared to the spirit-state I had just awoken from. Since my new found wisdom was still with me, I was convinced that I had not been dreaming or walking while asleep.
I knew then that I had just been personally visited by the Maker of Heaven and Earth.