2018 has played a huge role in my journey to self-discovery and has also been a big boost in maturity. I hoped that this would be a year of adventure and I was not disappointed, embarking on adventures that I did not foresee like starting a relationship.
I was disappointed many times but the year also had its very good moments and I celebrated each major occurrence regardless of the taste it left in my mouth usually in nights laced with Columbian gold and Spanish red with some good music to complete the threesome. I never let the smile leave my face and I never will because it is my only retaliation against the inevitable fate we all must face.
I am going to break my year into four segments; the two girls, career path, the disappointments and the lessons.
The Two Girls
Towards the end of last year, I got a 4-week old cat, Lucy because I have a thing for felines and I was really enjoying my own company and I guess I was also just really tired of humans. It was a really interesting experience and almost felt like raising a child. Taught her how to use the sandbox and watched her grow into a skilled hunter as she became the terror of lizards and wall geckos. I think I enjoyed watching the kills because I often caught myself smiling like a proud father.
When I made extra cash, I spoiled her with exotic cat food and when the days were not as smooth she learned to survive on simple home food. It was all the relationship I needed until I met the other girl in January and the closer I got to her the farther I got from Lucy whom I eventually neglected. Lucy died in June from birthing complications, one of the major events of the year in review. I still blame myself for this and I honestly wonder how men are able to keep more than one woman. I couldn’t even manage with a girlfriend and a cat lol.
When I met the other girl, I was not ready for a relationship but this was a friendship I wanted to keep. We broke all the rules for this one, we had differences in belief, we were age mates,worked in the same firm and she was just leaving an ex whom she was not completely over. Long story short, it was a beautiful six months or thereabout until the problems started. We both made one mistake too many and called it off. She went back to the ex and well…I miss drama free Lucy more than I miss her.
I was able to strike the right balance between my law career and my writing path. I was called to the bar late last year and this year I got a chance to do something I have always wanted to do. I actually lawyered. My friends like Dolapo who also suggested that I tell my 2018 story here didn’t let me stop writing and I am really grateful to them for it. I now firmly believe that creative writing will always have its special place in my life. I started my ghostwriting brand this year and I am thankful for the support and it has gotten this far. 2018 was an exciting year for career.
I probably give too much in trust but it is not something I should regret. I was disappointed many times this year by close associates but I will mention just one that almost left me in shock. How was I supposed to think that somebody I called a friend would defraud me and put me in serious debt? We were flat mates in law school, got called on the same day and shared a lot of adventures but that did not stop him from letting the devil tempt him. I took his word when he offered to help some of my associates with their law school posting issues, for a fee of course. I took money from these friends giving my word to refund if he did not deliver because I trusted him completely. He ended up leaving me with a substantial debt to settle because my hard-earned reputation was on the line. I have since forgiven but it is inevitable that he must one day face the consequences of his actions. This brings me to_
Nobody owes you anything.
We hear this everyday but we do not realise how deep this runs. Friends and even spouses do not owe you their loyalty. Nobody owes you even something as basic as being honest. Disappointments come and we must just take it in stride and learn unless you can execute your revenge that is (smiles).
Friendship is overrated.
Sad as this might sound but I think the older we get the harder it is to make true friends. As the world gets worse, people become more selfish and greedy so if we have old friends who have stood the test of time, we must hold onto them and realise that many others we will meet are nothing more than acquaintances. I am thankful for those friends.
Never Act on Impulse
When things happen that push us to what might seem like our limit, we really should give the emotions time to settle because more often than not, we end up regretting decisions made on emotional impulses.
Find your path and be good at it
There really is money to be made in basically every human endeavor. Build your network and be good at what you do.
- I finished serving this year and although I have strong reservations about the scheme, I am thankful for the people I met and it was nice to see that there are good number of young people who care about this country.
- There is a new wave of very talented Nigerian artistes on the rise. Their laid back music which experiments with sounds from the 80’s has this really good feel to it. People like Santi, Odunsi, Tomi Thomas, Funbi, Lady Donl and the OG’s like BOJ and SDC really caught my attention with their wave which they have termed Alté.
I am thankful for this gift of life and 2018 has given me a lot in success and lessons so I count my blessings and hope for an even better 2019.