2018 has been one hell of a year! It kinda sped by but it was a long one too. Weird. I really grew up this year. That happens when your superhero, someone you have always seen as the strongest person in your life, shows you that they are human after all. For me that person is my father. He is a diabetic and he had a heart attack late last year that caused other health complications.
This year I’ve gotten familiar with terms like “edema”, “kidney failure” and “dialysis”, “ICU”… What a wow! Even had to finally come to terms with the fact that I need to be more mindful of my diet and my health because I’m more at risk for certain health conditions thanks to family genetics and history. Not going to front and act like I haven’t broken down sometimes over the switch up of things in my life but after every break down, I pick myself up again and I know I’m much stronger now, and way more mature than I was a year ago. Good news is my Papa bear is doing much better and on the road to full recovery by God’s grace 🙏🏽
I don’t even want to write this next part down but here goes. After some months of great conversations and nice dates, a young man asked me to be his girlfriend and very freaked out about being in a relationship, I still said yes and I’m so glad I did. Already judging the mushiness that’s going to keep coming through if I go on with this point so all I’ll add before I lock up is that it has been one of the major highlights of my year to find myself with someone who treasures me and treats me how I want to be treated but never really have been till now.
I’ve continued with my music. This may not seem like much but many people don’t understand or appreciate the resilience and determination it takes to do music (especially my kind of music) or other forms of art and focus on it as your life’s work and mission. For a lot of people, success as a musician is only attained when you “blow”. I don’t think that way (anymore) but the uncertainty, the ridicule from society because you don’t have a “real job”, the being priced down constantly or not even getting paid at all when you do gigs, the waiting on others who are part of your success story to come on board because no matter how good you are, you need the people that see your vision and want to help you actualize it. It’s been a frustrating and humbling journey and I’m pretty sure I’ve only managed to do it through strength from God.
I must add though that I am extremely proud of my main career accomplishments this year which are significant growth in my craft, some amazing new songs under my belt (shamelessly going to plug in one of them, “Dreamer” which you can enjoy on different digital platforms—> https://projectfemme.fanlink.to/Dreamer ), and starting my own event which is an open mic show that features my band and other artists in my city that I respect and admire. I have no official sponsors yet and I don’t make money from it so it has been far from easy but it is rewarding because I am living a life of purpose and passion and for me, that’s better than job security.
The best thing about 2018 has been my spiritual growth. I have come to enjoy a deeper relationship with God. Many of us practice religion but don’t actually have a relationship with God and I’m so glad I’ve left that behind. I’ve sought after God this year and found Him. I feel His presence in my life more than ever before and I actually can say that I hear Him speak to me now. It has brought me more clarity, peace and joy and I know that no matter what I go through, I am never alone because He is with me.
That’s my 2018 in a nutshell- the year of extreme adulting 💪🏽Love and light and compliments of the season to all xxx.