Day 28: Tolufi

I’ve actually had the honour of sitting next to this iPad babe (@Tolufi). 😀 #OkBye


I have a lot to be thankful for this year. Finishing my master’s degree, my family, my friend’s and life basically. School was a totally different experience for me and I miss it. I got to head different group presentations not because I am an amazing leader, but because my spoken English was by far the best. I got oppressed by the Chinese girls in my class with their designer bags… Lord knows I thought of so many ways of getting one of them.  There is this friend of mine who came to class on Monday with this amazing handbag I was coveting {Father forgive me} I had to ask her where she got it and she went “Zolu (the chinko version of Tolu ) I got it from Selfridges and it was very cheap just £1500” At that point in my head I just went God punish you.. £1500 is cheap? .I just murmured nice. Class parties and dinners were overtly boring though. The music was horrible, plus people danced like they were being electrocuted. Dissertation was a whole lot of stress but I scaled through.

The most amazing part of this year for me is actually the second half of the year. I met this amazing girl who has sickle cell Anaemia. You actually would never know. She looks so good and healthy. I got to experience her crises for the first time in my life and I must say it is a very painful sight. There is nothing as painful as watching someone you love in so much pain, with nothing you can do about it. The Ambulance came to pick her up and she was just shouting and crying. At that point I started crying too because I just couldn’t take it anymore.

A day before her birthday, She had another crisis. This one was quite painful because we had plans. We were all supposed to spend the weekend at some resort in Spain.  The pain she feels is immeasurable. According to her “When I have my crisis, I am in a state of confusion. My bones ache so bad and I am short of breath and I really don’t know what to focus my attention on so I just scream” . I know there are debates about the sickle cell thing and people have so many views but you really do not understand how horrible it is until you experience it first-hand.  It was so bad that I called my parents to thank them for checking out their genotypes before they got married.

The amazing thing about her is that she is the most positive person I have ever met. I mean she has a lot of problems. She could die any day. Relationship wise after screening potential candidates who are of the AA genotype, she has to make sure He is ready to date someone with sickle cell which truthfully is difficult. Little things trigger her crises like the kind of water she drinks, drugs and so many more. Even through all this her faith in God is unwavering, obviously she complains sometimes but the way she trusts God amazes me. 

I have a huge problem with trusting people and I discovered this year that my lack of trust in people has transcended into my spiritual life. I actually pray and read my bible but I just didn’t trust God as much as I made myself believe. Absolute trust in God is probably one of the hardest things ever. It means you give him total control and you let Him steer you into the direction He pleases. No doubts no worries, absolutely nothing. I had to learn to give him complete control and let Him do with me as he pleases. It is still a work in progress but I am grateful for how far I have come.

I am starting a new phase of my life and for the first time ever I am looking forward to what the New Year holds for me.  I look forward to my career, my relationship with people but most especially my walk with God.  I am not going into the New Year thinking things are going to be perfect. I believe God is taking me through the “refiner’s fire” to mould me into what he wants me to be. 

I want 2012 to be all about God even when things are amazing or horrible, It should be all about Him.


Reading this was a privilege for me. Thank you Tolu 🙂  Edwin jumps out of the page at us tomorrow. Don’t miss it… 🙂


I love to learn. I love to teach. For me the two are the same.


  • aramaanda says:

    The need to consider genotypes in making marriage partner choices can’t be over-emphasized…I just hope our generation will be wiser

    Here’s wishing you a God-driven year…

    The electrocuted dances though? Would love to see that 😀

    • Tolufi says:

      Aww.. Thank you very much.
      I really hope people understand how important this is. I mean people still say stupid things like “Love would see them through” in this century faa..

      And the dances ehen.. If only I recorded them. Never felt they could come in handy *sad face*

      Have an amazing new year too

      • aramaanda says:

        The worst for me are the spiritual ones that say they want to ‘faith’ a genotype change…no problem as long as you get it done before you even marry! No one should knowingly saddle a child with such an illness…I pray your friend pulls through the turbulent years

        Rock on, girl!

  • highlandblue says:

    I know some sickle cell patients. I felt this article deeply. Thank you Tolu

    • Tolufi says:

      Thank you Efe for letting me make my writing debut on 19th Street.. You are therefore allowed to ask for up to half of my kingdom (which is basically my shoe collection).


  • ibetapassmynebo says:

    Zolu. .£1500. .loool

  • Sisi Yemmie says:

    Don’t mind those chinko girls…had a couple of them in my class…sometimes I just dey beef them, maybe they have a lot of money to spend cos they are mostly ‘only kids’….beef! Sickle cell anaemia…I cannot over emphasize the importance of checking genotypes before actually dating sef before water pass garri.

  • Chicasa says:

    Your debut write-up is great. I enjoyed this very much, simple and well articulated. Laughed hard at that “only 1500” thought.

    Sickle cell is real and painful both for the carrier and people around the individual. There’s a family friend that continuously gives her family hell because of this, she hasn’t accepted her condition to date. Ur friend is a courageous person.

    God bless you more and I wish you a better 2012

  • aramaanda says:

    I lost a friend to this some years ago & I still beef the parents when I see them for killing my friend >_<

  • Kemmiiii says:

    Come to think of it, I have never met anybody with Sickle Cell Anaemia.
    I particularly like this post.

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