Guess who’s back. Back again. Demi’s back, tell a friend!
Spent the last couple of days writing this post in my head… Scratch that; trying to. Guess who’s procrastination’s best friend?
The moment I’ve been dreading is finally here though. Time to turn my draft in, so here goes.
2016 has been a year of ups and downs. Fucking roller coaster really. Dreaded writing this post because the downs were all that were coming to my head and I knew the devil was trying to play some shitty game with me. He tried it!
Beginning of this year, I had my 30 days of hope post over at Tokunbo’s blog.
and the 30 days purposeful post half way through the year.
Let’s see Demi fared shall we?
1. “Swagged out graduation- that’s on the way. By God’s grace. Insha allah. Let’s see if that prize thing is feasible“
I took my final exams this year and Lord Jesus have mercayyy, IT WAS HELL! How I did not break down, I don’t know. I looked like skreps throughout the exam but baby girl was on a mission.
There was a lot of crying in frustration involved but Jesus took the wheel. Results came out and I sailed through. It didn’t dawn on me for a while. I still would wake up in panic many times thinking ‘Oh shit, I overslept and didn’t study for my paper’. Some serious PTSD swear down. Read about it here!
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Let me tell you a story…. This is a picture baby boy took of me, my mum and my sisters when we decided I needed a break and home was a good place to be. My mum was holding me that way because I was weeping. WEEPING (they were all laughing at me because they're all goats but that's not the point of this story). I was stressed. Tired. Frustrated. Honestly I'd had it. We were all laughing and gisting and out of nowhere I started crying. 'Ahn Ahn, Dr, kilode'. I couldn't put how I felt into words. I was just tired. O to su mi. My mother being my mother shed a few tears too seeing me break down like that (the rest as i said, goats). I know I would have laughed if I'd been in their shoes because my weeping that day was ridiculous . They were consoling/encouraging me but goats being goats…. We left home that day with me feeling stronger. I'd gotten this far, a few steps and I'd cross the finish line. No way I was giving up that easily. This thing had sucked too much of my life to let it go just like that. Abi? L.O.L Fast forward a few weeks; 'Faculty has met and the exam date is July 21' (About 4 weeks from the announcement). I went cold. I looked around me, my classmates looked like they were going to pass out. I said to myself 'im actually finished. No way I'm getting out of this unscathed.' We all tried to 'chest' it that day but by the time we got to the car park, tears were flowing. 'How we wan take do am shola'. Lol. You saw everybody around and it's me you're asking? Me? I look like I have hope to you? Forget mouth and encouraging words, baby girl no know shingbain! 'They're just making mouth, they'll shift it' 'we've not even completed the syllabus, obviously they'll move the exams' 'that's how they did last year, they'll move it'. CA and Mock exams came; standard wrecking balls. Late nights, brain on hyperdrive, extra classes, tests/exams all week, 6 hour exams, forgotten meals, more tears. 'They're still playing, they'll shift it. There's too much to do' July 21, 8 am, first paper, Theory. Lol, awon were yii o move kiniyii sha. August 24 2016, it's officially Doctor Ademisola Balogun. 8 years came to an end today.
So yeah, that’s the graduation part.
For the swagged out part, remember the deal I had with my registrar (Now Senior Registrar. Femo my boy! Super stoked about that too) at the beginning of the year? No? You refused to read that post ehn? See yourself? Ehn ehn jare, those of you that know what I’m talking about. That deal. Somehow somehow it happened. I got the best graduating student award in the department that scared me the most. Read about that in my convocation post here.
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Look who finished strong! Best graduating student in Oral and Maxillofacial surgery. You know you can't escape story time so yeah…. Before we started finals, two courses scared the living shit out of me. Surgery was one of them. I was too sure I was going to flunk. Too damn sure. Mock exams came and I burst out in tears on leaving the surgery oral exam. I had already failed in my mind before I even went in for the exam. I was defeated in spirit soul and body. Didn't help that the consultant was talking to me like I was expired egg buns and making me feel dumber than I already did. I remember my mum calling me right after and hearing me struggle not to cry. She kept saying 'don't worry. God has never failed you. He won't start now'. Lover boy called too and being the best man ever was in school compound in 5 minutes; work clothes and all. He didn't even understand all my crying and bawling and all the rubbish I was saying but somehow the tears stopped flowing (because really, how can I be spoiling face when a fine boy is cuddling me and kissing it better?) 😍😍😍😍 Mock exams result came out and I topped the class. But me being my faithless self, put it to sheer luck. I had heard stories of people who aced continuous assessment/mock and still ended up with resits and that kept coming to my mind. Pretty sure God wanted to smack me up the head at that point. How dare I? Fast forward main exam; external examiner couldn't stop going on about me. In my mind I was just like 'ahn ahn. Emi naa. Na me be this?'. Cloud 10! Clinical exam both supervising examiners kept doing the same (while trying to give me sliding tackle with bananas. But thank God for favor). Somehow I still doubted. Because I'm human. And my human mind couldn't possibly grasp how miracles happen even to those undeserving of it. But I walked out of the clinic that day and said a prayer. Committed the exam into his hands. I saw a few of my registrars and senior registrars and started referring to them as my colleagues; I was not going to fail surgery. Mba. Exam rumors were flying about, the Devil wanted to give me hypertension but my God said no. 😂😂😂 Today was proof of his grace!
Walking down to shake the VC while my mum watched from her seat with the other Robed Academic something something people ehn? It was everything. Everything! We fought that same day o because I didn’t come and take pictures with her office people but that’s besides the point. ????? Long story short God helped achieve the number 1 thing I wanted this 2016. That’s the major highlight of this year really. Enough to blur out all the other shitty parts. So yeah, Dr Demi didn’t flunk. Booyah! Grandpa died a few months before I graduated. Wish he’d stayed a bit longer to see me finally become his baby doctor but Cancer is a fucking bitch and gives no hoot about iyalaya anybody.
My sister graduated Uni strong and got into Law school, my other sister graduated secondary school with a badass result too and got into Uni.
PS: I was out recently and somebody went ‘Dr Balogun’ and it literally took a few seconds to realize he was referring to me. Ko tii mora. ????
2. Business has been great this year. All 3 of them (Instagram: @avril_photography, case_notes_ , @jewelry_boxng) Awon boys scammed me out of a huge sum but God helped me bounce back. Like I didn’t even feel it. I just trusted I’d make it back and God was faithful. I learnt a lot sha. No be everybody wey dey follow you shine teeth you suppose show canines to too. Lol. So ehn, patronize me guys. Let’s make 2017 better. ☺️
3. I still didn’t buy a new car. But I got a new place and started on my studio. so yay me!
4. I travelled to Lagos for jobs, Abuja for an interview, Abeokuta for jobs, Akure for jobs. Where else? Definitely not the travel plans I had for the year. Tears inna me eyes.
5. ‘Be happier‘
I considered therapy this year. Hit some pretty low lows. The D word? I don’t know. But it’s been tough. Very. I almost didn’t even write this post. I’ve had to give myself pep talks more times than I can count but I promised myself this post wasn’t going to be about this. So it won’t.
6. I got out of school and threw myself into workshops, trainings and conferences the first couple of months. All the time and opportunities I lost because of school, I tried to regain. I did every little thing I could to better myself and my businesses. The journey is only just beginning but I know God has placed me on the right path! Oh, I got to attend Kelechi Amadi Obi’s workshop too! That was MAJOR! That’s another testimony on its own.
7. I had a major scare with my dog, AJ sometime in October. Got back home and my baby was quarter to dead. I totally lost it. Nobody had thought to inform me she was ill and hadn’t been eating etc. I legit lost it. Never raked for my folks the way I did that day. Spent the next few weeks fighting to save her. With a PCV of 10% her life was slipping away and there was nothing I could do but pray and hope for a miracle.
I broke down in tears one day when I was listening to all the poor prognosis gist. My able doc @imagervet had to walk me out of the clinic to comfort me. Like why? I raised this pup and her mother. I wasn’t ready to let her go. I felt like i was losing a child! How she survived that illness I don’t know. Nothing short of a miracle. Prayers work. As stupid as it looked bawling my eyes out because of a dog, God answered. AJ is back to being the pest that she is knocking me over at will.
8. My sister baes took the first step in the marriage kini this year. Well, one did a week ago and the other is taking it today. Rhai and Vivian, I love you both and wish you the best marriage has to offer. So yeah, e remains me now. As you people will soon start carrying shoulder giving somebody marriage advice now. Hian!
9. I struggled a lot with my relationship with God this year. More than ever maybe. He stayed faithful still. So who am I to stop trying? Still yearning for that BFF relationship with him. We push.
10. I learned to cut off dead weight. Some relationships are really not worth the stress guys. Stop suffering yourselves for nothing. It was hard and hurt for a while but nothing beats peace of mind.
With these few points of mine I hope I’ve been able to convince you and confuse you; Life will always be full of highs and lows please learn to look on the bright side. Truth is I’m only stopping here because I know I tend to ramble. There’s a lot more that gap one in 2016 but let’s stop here. I started typing this post with a lot of sadness but I feel a lot better now. I have a lot to be grateful for. 2017 bring on the goodness!
D signing out of 2016 like….