The day is Wednesday 10th of December 2014 and I just got my unfinished project thrown out of my final year project defense….. ‘My friend get out, go and finish it’.
I didn’t have the mind to tell Dr. Ayorinde that I was tired of school, tired of trying to make my project work, tired of the gaping hole in my sense of self, tired of Lagos traffic, tired of being impatient, tired of life and even tired of being tired.
Now that I think about it, I should probably thank him, nobody wants to hear a sob story. I then decided to trek the length of Ojuelegba because I wanted to finally understand the essence of life but I soon found out this was a bad decision that only works in Nollywood movies. Bummer right? Moving on.
I finally finished and submitted a week later. Thanks to the Universe hahahaha.
My name is Akinbobola (Yoruba girls call me ‘Bobo’, cool folk call me ‘Bobs’, but what I’d really like to be called is ‘Rich’) and this is my review for the year 2014.
This December 2014, I finally became a graduate, after all the years of toiling and cramming information needlessly. I was frustrated a lot this year, a lot, and the one thing that drove me to graduate was the simple fact that I was supposed to. I got so irritated and needlessly agitated about finishing school, I just wanted it all to be over.
I was disappointed in myself and dealt with a lot of depression. Sometimes in school I’d get so depressed I’d take long walks in the evenings, stroll into dark corners and just stare into space (see what I did there?). Even my roommates got tired of my mood swings. My grades were not up to par. I finally got to final year and it looked like I’d been wasting the last 5 years of my life. My dad was disappointed in me. I know because he told me, and no this is not a sob story.
I have decided to make this review about the people that literally pushed me through this year and some of them don’t even know it. 2014 was basically a blur so I thought; why not appreciate a few people that helped me make it to December in one mind? It’s amazing what I can pick up from people when I’m not even looking out to learn.
First up are my family, my siblings Adeolu and Adeola. They understood that as the first born I was under pressure to succeed, and that all they could do for me was ‘understand’. At the time it didn’t seem like much but now that I look back, it helped. I’m also thankful for my folks, pops for demanding the best and my mother for her prayers and words of encouragement.
I’m thankful for my roommates in school and especially Segun. This guy was all over me (no homo), like it used to itch him deep in his soul anytime he saw me lazing around or doing anything apart from school work. At a point we wanted to rip out each other’s throats but we didn’t. He’ll probably make a good father or slave driver. He taught me a little about tolerance.
Tinuade, my ride or die chick, she was with me in my lowest of lows, when I was dirt deep in myself and my woes, she found a way to always drag me out, at least to places where I could breathe comfortably. Sometimes I think she’s psychic. Thank God for Tinu.
Bukki, thank you for lending a listening ear when I needed to rattle on and on about rubbish and stuff that generally didn’t concern you, without once passing judgment (though you did call me ‘mumu’ a lot), I think that in itself is a superpower. We are going to be friends for a while.
How can I forget Afoma and her smile? Her smile was a beacon in the dark, a reminder of why I could not afford to give up.
Temilore, one of the only truly amazing people I know, your kindness and tenderheartedness rubbed off on me on more ways than one. Also you are beautiful inside and out, never forget that. Thank you for dealing with this piece of work and keeping up with Buba, I know it’s not easy, I can’t even keep up with myself.
Sabina, my crazy Sabo, thank you for your honesty, love and care. You have a big heart, I know people make you feel like it’s a weakness but it really isn’t, it is your greatest strength, always remember Bomboy said so.
Sewa – Sewa’s friendship is one of the most productive I have at the moment. She brings out the best in me and believes in me to a fault, she believes in me so much sometimes it gets embarrassing. She made me a part of her book club idea (@TheMusers), of which I am very grateful. We held a successful book meet earlier in the year and she also introduced me to the TEDxUnilag team (watch out for that by the way). Her spaghetti is world class and her person is even better. Thank you Sewa for believing in me and being one of the only few Yoruba girls I know that do not call me ‘Bobo’.
Thankful for Kenny, Kelechi, Deolu, and the crew for giving me the semblance of a social life this year (Did I tell you I was a hermit? No? ). Uche for skimming beneath the surface and Ebuwa for her peculiar understanding.
Special thanks to Edi and Victor, Edi for telling me the truth and being frank all of the time (I wanted to rip out his throat a couple of times because he was so accurate); I appreciate that a lot and Victor for being my ride or die Nigga, amean I jumped buses and “waka’d’’ under the sun for hours with this guy. There is no greater bond than the bond of suff….you know what? Never mind.
And to my new friends Dolapo (You know I cannot forget you smallie), a little too mature for your age but we like am like that, Oreoluwa and Dayo I want to give you guys a shout out and say you are all amazing people.
If I didn’t mention you I’m sorry, there has not been light since morning and mans is hungry.
The most important lesson I learned this year was that I’m no superman, I might have been in some distant past or life, but I am not at the moment and that’s okay. I also learned that I was a little bit too set in my ways – a little flexibility never killed anybody.
I really put myself out there this year, forged friendships, excelled at some, failed woefully at others, cut people off without a moment’s notice, was cut off, failed at trying to get into relationships and had my fair share of might haves and near misses. I consciously let myself be pressured into thinking I needed a girlfriend, I am never letting that happen again. I think I’ll be fine being single forever a little while longer – this baby boy life won’t live itself you know.
And oh I finally recovered all sections of my ‘mumu’ button from somebody; it was a liberating experience to say the least.
It is a sad thing to admit but this year I discovered that I do not have a plan for my life. I won’t even lie, the future scares me but I find solace in the fact that I am made to last, I will not give up and I will keep trudging forward regardless of what might lay in wait for me. For 2015, the plan is to acquire relevant skills, learn a thing or two and beef up the curriculum vitae, let’s see what happens from then on.
After all, the journey of a thousand miles does begin with a step doesn’t it?
Yes it does, Akinbobola. Oh yes it does. You put one foot in front of the other long enough and you realise after a while you’ve reached your destination and even surpassed it. Glad you found such a support system in your friends. Prepare for a long journey with these people. Thank you very much for sharing.