January 2015, I was sure this was the year. MY year. The year that my life was finally going to take shape and prove to friends and family that I am not just a waste of investments, full of incompletes. I had the year mapped out and was pretty sure there was no other way it could go.
There are so many things to be thankful for, but at times it just seems so far away.
But I thank God because His mercies endures forever
Let me back track a bit…
Rewinding to 2014…
Quit working for my mum. Even when I had no clear idea of what I wanted to do next. A couple of ideas in the oven but they were all half baked.
The Boo finally relocated back to Nigeria and then the real relationship started and trust me it was quite bumpy at first. Made me wonder if what we had before across the ocean was child’s play. It wasn’t easy but it was and is worth it.
Last quarter of the year, I was pretty sure I had found my calling – Food. This is one of my babies and I decided this was it therefore I started working towards it. Took the first couple of baby steps in it in December and I was pretty sure 2015 was just going to flow right into it.
Back to 2015..
But, I needed a bit to start up which I couldn’t come up with on my own. Was advised to put that at the back burner for now and look for salary job so as to raise the capital I want and also get a bit of savings as The boo and I were already making plans to get married this year.
Februrary, March, April
My parents and I fought a lot over the marriage issue, not because they did not love him but IMO, they weren’t ready to let their baby girl go amongst other reasons (also, you can’t rush a Lagosian to do her only daughter’s wedding anyhow).
Relationship with them became strained and tense. I let go after a while because I just did not have strength for such and decided to just face other things and let God do His thing.
Looking for job; “send your CV to so and so, he promised to be of help”, “she owes me”, “blah blah blah”. Nothing.
Decided to get busy so I started bead training.
May 12th my birthday. For the first time in my life, I cried like a baby. Saddest day of the year. I told everyone it was PMS so I won’t have to answer questions. Felt like I was a failure, nothing to show for the one year that just went by. In fact was in a worse condition than last year.
June, July, August
According to my Almighty plans, should have been married by now, or getting ready to. My parents were not even talking about it. I gave up. On everything and everybody. Most especially myself. Decided to try and repair things with God as I had drifted away for a while but wasn’t sure how. But I guess he understood that I needed Him more than ever.
September, October, November, December
I decided that corporate job wasn’t for me. Took a course in events planning and resurrected my food business idea. Decided that I will in one way or the other, raise the money needed (ideas are welcome. lol)
Suddenly, the parents asked me to tell his people that they could officially come in October. And we could fix any date next year.
Come and see a Yoruba Mama in action. She overturned the house because they were coming for the introduction of her only daughter. Renovations went on for a whole month!
October came, thankfully we could keep the introduction pretty small (trust me it was a miracle) and it was beautiful one.
Year 2015 wasn’t a perfect year. In fact in comparison, it falls in the category of my lowest years.
But I grew up.
I learnt to stand for myself.
I learnt not to quit on my dreams and passions
I learnt to dare to fly: it’s scary but it won’t kill you.
I learnt that God is the only “sure” I need in my corner; lean on Him and not in your on understanding and He will direct your path.
2016 is a new beginning in more ways than one. Will be getting married early in the year to the man who is beyond what I ever imagined.
I know it is not going to be a smooth journey all the way, but I know His grace will see me through.
Hopefully, by my 25th in May, my business will be up and running.
Plan to work on and diligently improve on my faith and relationship with God. And little by little everything will be fall in place.
Happy new year everyone.
Happy new year to you too Toyin. Grateful to God for your growth and for the promise of new beginnings. He will perfect what he started.