I’m not sure where to start. This year started with me being in my 2nd semester of 100 level medical school and presently, I’m in the 1st semester of 300 level. I should think that pretty sums up the fact that this year moved too fast for me. I could barely keep up with the 2015 train.
2015 surprised me. I was 17 one night and 18 the next morning. All of a sudden, I was an adult. I wasn’t sure what that meant. I’m still not sure what it all means because in my mind I’m still 16. I still feel like I’m stuck in the year 2013 when I wrote my WASSCE and UTME.
I have accepted my adulthood that 2015 gifted me in great strides. My 18th is the best birthday I’ve ever had yet. I’m still a bit ashamed to say that I cried when I looked and saw all the amazing people around me, most of whom I got to know better in 2015.
The year zoomed by pretty fast. In true to type fashion, one day I had no international passport, the next day I did. One day, I was in Port Harcourt and the next in Lagos at the American Embassy. Everything moved too fast. I got to go to more states and countries this year than I’ve ever been to in my entire life.
Paris, France was enchanting. It was a really beautiful place but I couldn’t wait to leave because America was ahead for me. America disappointed me. It was not what I’d thought of in my childhood dreams. Everyone moved too fast in this country. People had to drive for several minutes to look for a parking space. However, I fell in love with Starbucks and Chipotle. All the while, I missed Nigeria. I thought of all that I was missing back home – certain key events in school and even the fact that lectures were going on. I wish I had enjoyed every moment more.
I didn’t read as much as I wanted to this year. I still have a large number of books in my library that are untouched or half-read. I want to say it’s because I was way too involved with school work as well as having a life outside, that there was no time. I can’t. I simply lost track of the goals I’d set out to accomplish. 2015 was supposed to be the year I completed my short story collection. It’s supposed to have at least 13 stories. I’m 4 stories short, but I’m hopeful about what 2016 would bring.
I lost a dear friend this year. No, my friend did not die. We had an argument we couldn’t recover from. We’re trying to get back to speaking terms by saying the occasional hi and liking each other’s pictures on Instagram. If there’s any thing I’ve gotten from this year, it is that no one is irreplaceable.
Medical school has been a humbling and beautiful experience. You get what you give. So far, I seem to have been giving it a good enough shot and the rewards keep coming. I grew a lot this year – from the girl who ran away from roaches to one that stared cadavers right in the eye figuratively (their eyes were closed) and dissected away. I still have a love-hate relationship with medicine because it’s easy to think about how I could easily be in my finals next year. I’m over that because there really is no rush.
To say, I discovered myself would be a blanket statement. I fell in love with myself and I didn’t self-destruct. I had some episodes of unexplained bouts of sadness. I realized that I could write them away when it felt tough and tuck them in a safe place. I look back now on some of the things I wrote when I was pretty sad and I’ve realized it does get better eventually. The cloud does pass. My mother would say, o ga di nma – It gets better. That’s good enough for me even though I seized no bae.
God has been a constant this year. I didn’t grow in my relationship with him, I missed services whenever I could. I can count the number of times I went to church with just my fingers. Somehow, he seemed to always be there for the times I needed to talk about anything in prayer. That part was difficult because most times, I struggled with unbelief. Philippians 4:6 was extremely comforting, like when I worried because I thought I’d get an F and I ended up with a C.
As this year comes to an end, I’ve realized I need to let some things go and not over-think things. I’ve learnt that I need to enjoy the moment more and not just think about the next train-station. In 2016, I will enjoy the ride. I hope everyone does the same because we are not just meant to be passers-by. All in all, I have no regrets, just lessons learnt and cliches that seem to fit.
Thanks a lot for letting me tell my story. I like to interact with people a lot, and so my Twitter handle is @trezhi and my email is firstname.lastname@example.org . O ga di nma.
Hmmmmmm. Really nice to meet you Treasure, Nwanyi Oma. Na real o di nma. Dear Story Tellers ndi America, please flourish.